Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Womb Pimpin'

Last night I watched a documentary that followed the trials and tribulations of women who have babies for cash. Now while this is a very selfless act, to give up your body for the happiness of complete strangers, it did get me wondering. Besides the money, £10,000 up to £20,000 a pop, what would posses someone to spend most of their adult life knocked up? One woman had gone through the process 13 times and now at the age of 45 was looking baby number 14. Great pension plan but what must her health insurance cost?

Now, I’ve never been pregnant so I don’t know how it feels but I know a lot of people who have been and they all seem to come down with this that or the other. Fat feet, sore back, rashes, diabetes, moody and god know what else. But as they say, no pain no gain. Fair enough, if it’s your own kid I’m sure the pleasure outweighs the pain. But you can’t honestly tell me you’d go through nine months of living hell for a complete stranger’s child? That’s just hormones gone ‘I-must-make-babies’ mad! These ladies are on Coo-Coo land!

On that note, having a baby for a loved one who can’t conceive/carry is a beautiful thing. I take my hat off to those ladies who do that for their sisters, cousins etc. Personally, I couldn’t. I’ve been told that being pregnant is a very empowering thing and makes you feel complete. I think this is because you’re fulfilling your animal purpose. Women are baby making machine. That’s why we’re here. To prepare, produce and then pop. Thank god society has allowed up to vote in between our nine month Triple P Processes. Otherwise we’d get so bored! Apparently during the pregnancy you feel at one with your baby. I’m sorry but if I ever go through nine months of not seeing my fat feet, craving weird things, mood swings, a sore back and on top of that, form some kind of whacked-out bond with the parasite growing inside of me; you can bet your bottom dollar I’m keeping the little monster. Like hell I’m walking away from all of that without a trophy!

No, I think if you’re going to have a baby for cash you have some deep seeded problems and insecurities. You don’t need to pimp out your womb to feel loved, special, complete and needed. But in saying that, these women have mad a lot of people happy and themselves a lot of money. If you can’t have children, maybe taking advantage of these women and their fragile state of mind isn’t such a bad thing. I know if I couldn’t conceive/carry my own child that I would probably consider jumping on the baby train and pay a fruit loop to have one for me. If anything else, at least I’d keep my figure and my boobs wouldn’t sag. I’d pay £10,000 for that get out Jail Free card any day!

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